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The most important issue most of us can be taught by effective negotiations skills training is the importance to create a specific frame for a discussion, otherwise we are beginning our discussions within the default frame of the other person. Here is some aspects to take into account as you prepare for a difficult conversation.

1. Remember that you are dealing with a person who has ambitions, desires and aspirations much like everybody.

If you have to deliver bad news, make sure that you frame it sensitively. It is important for individuals to preserve their dignity and there is absolutely no reason to create animosity & resistance within your counterpart.

For instance, let's say you have had a poor performing employee whom you have decided to discharge.

One way of delivering the news might be:

Tony, after thoroughly reviewing your track record and taking into account our previous discussions regarding your inadequate performance, I have taken a final decision to terminate your services. Unfortunately my decision is final and I would like you to hand over any outstanding items and leave with immediate effect.

An alternative way of delivering the news could possibly be:

Tony, it saddens me to notify you that I have decided to discontinue your services. I reached this decision since it is necessary that there is a 100% match between our expectations and your capacity to deliver and I feel strongly that your skills will be more valued in a different type of position rather than this one.

If you believe that you really would like to carry on in this type of role then I would like to advise that you pay attention to the following, possibly even invest in further improvement in this respect. Thank you for having made the effort to meet up with our requirements and all the best with your future endeavours.

In the 2nd situation you are at least recognising the fact that an attempt was made on the part of the member of staff and that you are happy to help them refine their approach so that they can become more successful in future.

2. Effective negotiation training confirms that we must acknowledge our weaknesses.

When you have done something for which you should apologise, you should never shift the blame, but accept full responsibility. We have much more regard for individuals who own up to their errors compared to people who dodge responsibility. Follow up your admission of guilt by asking the question how you can remedy the situation. Very few people have the belief that just about everything must be perfect each time. After all, people are all human beings and it is inevitable that you or anyone else for that matter will be making mistakes from time to time.

If you ask what it is that can be done to remedy the circumstance you will be surprised to discover that generally people will be more than pleased with the fact that you apologised and will not demand anything additional aside from an assurance that the mistake will never be repeated.

Make sure you treat people with dignity and compassion. Even those individuals that seem to be hard as nails generally act this way as a defence against getting hurt.

It is not always easy to treat others with respect and dignity however it is definitely an objective well worth seeking, but deploy this advice and add to your sales training objectives, the results will speak for itself.

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